ending the un-ended

Well once I got up there.. I cant remember where I was exactly in my story haha but I warmed up on shyza shyza and then snytonga and moved on to the Hate Satan Proj. I was feeling rather strong for not having been on the route in such a seemingly endless time but after 15 or so tries I had the route's movement back under control, relatively. Once. Just once. I made it all the way to the end with my toe on the jug you need to heelhook so you can hand foot match. But my body would just not let me make that tiny move. Toe to heel. Toe to heel. Next time. ah. Beautiful route. I get excited thinking about it. sometimes I think for a nice day with doing that route I would have given up this weekend.. but i dont know, ill have a chance at doing it hopefully soon if i dont fall into decay because of lack of a gym haha(churning stomach, sick with fear). Currently I dont know what is happening with the gym. If I loose it i face problems. With its current condition I face problems also though. I cant wait for summer. outside is where I want to be. Outside. Sun. Perfect Sandstone Bouldering